


The Goose Place

by heartbeatstumbles



Category: The Good Place (TV), Untitled Goose Game (Video Game)
Genre: Don’t copy to another site, Gen, Goose Harasses Mild-Mannered Character with Glasses, No Prior Knowledge of Untitled Goose Game is Required to Read This Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2019-10-20
Packaged: 2020-12-27 05:00:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21113060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heartbeatstumbles/pseuds/heartbeatstumbles
Summary: It's a lovely morning in The Good Place, and there is a horrible goose.





	The Goose Place

**Author's Note:**

  * For [flipflop_diva](https://archiveofourown.org/users/flipflop_diva/gifts).

**Reboot 5**

First it’s the forking alarm. Whoever the heck Real Eleanor Shellstrop was, she must have really loved clowns, geese, and ash-kissing. Who in their right mind wants to be woken up by a _goose honking_? 

(When she mentions it to Michael, he misunderstands and says he can change it so a real goose wakes her up in the morning. No thanks.)

Apparently, a lot of the residents _ love _ geese, so the river behind them is infested with geese who never. Stop. Honking. The solution, of course, is to just kill them all, but Chidi said it would be “morally bad” or whatever, so she lets them be.

Eleanor learns to let go of a lot of things with Chidi’s help over the coming months. She’s so grateful for the kind nerd (though she would never admit it). Living in The Good Place is _ hard, _ especially when she has to be nice to all these nerds, and follow all these stupid rules, and listen to Glenn and Anthony’s stupid faces talk about their stupid lives. But still, something else is off, and she can’t quite put her finger on it. Until one day, when everything clicks together with startling clarity.

Eleanor, Chidi, Tahani, and Jason have their picnic ruined by a particularly tenacious goose who steals their picnic basket and shirts all over Chidi’s shoes after flapping its wings at him to make him drop his sandwich. They are as far away from the lake as they possible, and yet these stupid forking geese are _ always _ able to target them. Eleanor is pretty sure that geese didn’t have teeth like that on Earth, but then again, there weren’t any birds in Arizona, so she can never know for sure.

“Might as well call this place The Goose Place, am I right? These geese never stop coming. It’s kind of creepy, actually. They keep following us around, like this one ex I had who didn’t stop following me around until I got a restraining order. I never saw him again, apparently he moved back in with his mother and had to move to _ Florida_. Yech. Sorry, Jason.” 

As Chidi freaks out while Tahani is being chased by three more geese trying to eat her dress as Jason is happily attracting more by feeding them bread, Eleanor comes to a realization.

“Holy _shirt_,” she realizes, _ THIS _ is The Bad Place!”

**Snap.**

**Author's Note:**

> "Oh, dip! These geese remind me of when me and my best friend Pillboi and my bud Donkey Doug used to whip spray paint cans at flamingos. Except these geese have shorter legs, so it's a lot harder."

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [The Goose Place [Podfic]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22069708) by [Lunate8](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lunate8/pseuds/Lunate8)
  * [[podfic] The Goose Place](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22386790) by [secretsofluftnarp](https://archiveofourown.org/users/secretsofluftnarp/pseuds/secretsofluftnarp)


End file.
